Sex and Parenting: A Perspective from Kabbalah

Will Parfitt

Kabbalah teaches that men and women are created equal but have been divided from one another, and within themselves. Sex is considered a holy sacrament which can bring the divided back together. A Kabbalistic metaphor says that the vessels God used during creation were broken and our work in life is to repair these vessels. Sex undertaken in a loving context is a powerful method for such repair.

Particularly important is sexual contact between a couple on Friday nights when, during sex, the feminine aspect of god manifests and helps bring extra energy to the love- making. To make a baby, the Kabbalah teaches the couple should focus their attention on god during their love-making and open themselves to being a channel for the manifestation of a new soul. Any and all other procedures - which might include candle lighting, prayer, ritual chanting, bathing for purification, and so on, are considered useful extras but the real focus is on two people coming together to create a new being, thus mirroring god's original creation.

Kabbalah stresses that parental responsibility to the new soul does not end with the procreative act but should include the upbringing and guidance of the child to adulthood, helping the child to feel at one with him- or her-self and not fragmented within. Thus the work of 'repairing the vessels' is not just accomplished through sex but through a life of dedication to the power of love and unity.



Will Parfitt is a UKCP registered psychotherapist and an experienced and innovative group leader. Trained in Psychosynthesis, he has more than forty years experience of working with psychospiritual development, and travels internationally to run courses on a variety of subjects including kabbalah and psychosynthesis. Will is author of several books including 'The Complete Guide to Kabbalah', 'The Something and Nothing of Death', 'Kabbalah:The Tree of Life' and 'Psychosynthesis: the Elements and Beyond.